Latest Tweets:

funnyordie:

MethMatch.com
Get high on love with the No. 1 dating site for meth addicts in the new issue of The Occasional!

funnyordie:

MethMatch.com

Get high on love with the No. 1 dating site for meth addicts in the new issue of The Occasional!

*69

funnyordie:

Guy Trying to Protect His Car from Hail

Is this a good idea? Aww, HAILLLLL no!

Reblog if you’re a fan of Jennifer Lawrence.

sra-foreveralone:

Let’s see how many people on tumblr like love her.

image

(Source: itsyourlawrence, via fallen-fables)

nickmoorexvx:

Yesterday a guy came up to me at work was like “How are you ever going to get a job with all those piercings?”

I’ll say that again. 

A guy came up to me

at work

and asked “How are you ever going to get a job with all those piercings?”

(Source: deathwingxvx, via fallen-fables)

humming-metallica-in-the-tardis:

miss-azura:

sheislove530:

-everysecond:

4ngelo:

theodorepython:

miami-tea:


The Defibrillator Toaster
My mom would be so annoyed… every morning I would run into the kitchen screaming “WE’RE LOSING THEM!!! BEEP BEEP BEEPBEEPBEEP!”
“DON’T YOU DIE ON ME, DAMNIT!!!  NURSE, WE NEED 12 CC’S OF CREAM CHEESE, STAT!!!”
He’s bread, Jim.
Time of deliciousness: 7:15 A.M
If we don’t restart his heart , he’s toast! 
JESUS CRUST.
JAM IT!
“Daddy’s in a butter place now, kids.”

I WASN’T EVEN GOING TO REBLOG UNTIL I SAW THE SHIT TON OF PUNS

HES BREAD JIM

JESUS CRUST

If we don’t restart his heart , he’s toast!

Best. Laugh. Ever.

I’m toast. 

HE’S BREAD, JIM.

humming-metallica-in-the-tardis:

miss-azura:

sheislove530:

-everysecond:

4ngelo:

theodorepython:

miami-tea:

The Defibrillator Toaster

My mom would be so annoyed… every morning I would run into the kitchen screaming “WE’RE LOSING THEM!!! BEEP BEEP BEEPBEEPBEEP!”

“DON’T YOU DIE ON ME, DAMNIT!!!  NURSE, WE NEED 12 CC’S OF CREAM CHEESE, STAT!!!”

He’s bread, Jim.

Time of deliciousness: 7:15 A.M

If we don’t restart his heart , he’s toast! 

JESUS CRUST.

JAM IT!

“Daddy’s in a butter place now, kids.”

I WASN’T EVEN GOING TO REBLOG UNTIL I SAW THE SHIT TON OF PUNS

HES BREAD JIM

JESUS CRUST

If we don’t restart his heart , he’s toast!

Best. Laugh. Ever.

I’m toast. 

HE’S BREAD, JIM.

(Source: secretsbest, via fallen-fables)

wattpad:

A wattpadder’s life..

wattpad:

A wattpadder’s life..

(Source: amandaonwriting, via wattpad)


cover the middle and you go faster, cover the outside and you go slower.

cover the middle and you go faster, cover the outside and you go slower.

(Source: unexplainedcinema, via fallen-fables)

seththewolf:

sarrahxhabibi:

animaniac101:

hthe-stark-knight-rises:

kommandanthydra:

agent-silva:

emmaontheice:

toothian-a:

guardianhiccup:

fawksman:

starksmash:

OMG REBLOG THIS & LOOK AT UR BLOG ITS COMPLETELY DIFERENT

Me

iM  CHIR YING BC THE WAY IT LOOKS ON YOUR BLOG SEND HELP

oh my

i dunt see it

EDIT***:

WHATTHE HELL.

…You had my curiosity…

[After]

WHAT THE JESUS FUCK IS THIS VOODOO?!

(I’ll try it

edit

WHAT)

how did you

WHAT

im so confused what is

wait oh

[after]
WTF!?!?!?!?!?! Someone get the fucking salt!
http://media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lliff9eOyl1qb3ygk.gif

Oh my god

(Source: jesscookie, via fallen-fables)